Archive for the 'Maggie Speaks' Category
Wednesday, August 26th, 2020
This is me, Maggie, when my mom came close to making my dinner all wrong. I know, it was almost a big huge awful disastrous day! I’ll tell you all about it.
First, you need to know the right way to make my dinner: Mom is supposed to put dry food in first, then add wet food, and mash it all up until it’s yummy goodness.
So yesterday, after I reminded my mom it was time to eat, several times!, she got up from the computer.
First she put in the dry food and everything was going fine.
Then she tried to put in this:
Can you even believe it????? I almost had COFFEE in my DINNER!! The horror!
Luckily, Mom woke up and smelled the coffee just in time! Hahahaha, I’m so funny! Anyhow, she made my food super yummy and I ate it all!
That’s my almost disastrous day story. I hope you all liked it!
Wednesday, July 22nd, 2020
Hi guys, it’s me, Maggie! I has a story. So one day, I jumped in my chair and found it like this:
This is not my chair blanket! I don’t know who took it or why. Isn’t that weird? I ended up having to do this sad face for hours while I pondered the case of the missing blanket.
By the way, I checked my kennel, my dog beds, and the couch I’m sometimes allowed to get on, but no blanket. So I got back in my chair, and worried that maybe Corner Cat got into the house and stole it. Corner Cat is super sneaky. He hides in the bushes at the corner house, and hisses or jumps out. Probably, he’s a Ninja Cat.
My mom finally noticed my sad face, and she went into the room with the big machines and found it! Guys we found my blanket!
Can you all see my serious face here? I’m watching to make sure the blanket snatcher doesn’t return and hide my blanket in the big white machine again.
Wednesday, June 24th, 2020
Hi guys, it’s me, Maggie! See here I am resting by my mom when she’s working.
Did you know? I have two super important jobs. One is making sure my mom doesn’t work too long. I’m pretty good at that. I make her get up to take me on walks, get me treats, let me out back and, of course, eat dinner at 4 p.m. sharp. See my mom is not supposed to slip into her pre-Maggie days of working too long at the computer and hurting her bones and stuff.
Good thing I’m here, right???
Want to know my other job? Mom gave my a pro-mo-tion! It used to be I just played chase with my lizard friends.
But…um…sometimes I accidently, totally not on purpose, kill them. I may have done that twice this week so far.
Anyhow, Mom says I’m now the Director of the Lizard Depopulation Project.
I’m not sure what those words mean, but I suspect it’s that I’m super-duper fast and really good at catching lizards when we play chase. And I am!
Those are my important jobs, what are yours?
Tuesday, March 24th, 2020
Hi Guys, it’s me Maggie. Do you see? I’m Social Distancing.
My mom explained to me what it means, and how it’s super important right now. So on our walk, I sat down to let other people pass by at a safe distance. I was good at it too! But then…I saw one of my bestest friends ever–one of the really cool (human) girls who live across the street from me. I forgot all about social distancing and ran right up to her, and I kind of wiggled all of her in happiness.
I was real sorry when I realized my mistake.
But then Mom told me it’s okay, because doggies aren’t the sick ones, and that I made my bestest friend ever happy today which is an important job too, and I felt much better.
So I told you guys all my story because I want you all to know that I’m trying real hard to help make all humans feel better.
Wednesday, December 11th, 2019
Guys! Look! I have one and a half Elf ears. And Wizard Dad says I’m getting white eyebrows and a beard almost as good as Santa’s too. That must mean I’m almost magical like Santa and his Elves!
You know what else? Yesterday I had to go get a bath and a puppy pedicure. I don’t really like those. BUT…Wizard Dad said I could stay there for three whole hours, which meant I got to play with my human friend Emily, and lots of other dogs before my bath! I was so excited when I got there, I ran right in to my friends and forgot to say goodbye to Wizard dad And look, my ears are real clean.
If I was a real Elf, I’d wave my magic paw, or maybe my magic ears because I have some big ears that can hold a lot of magic, and I’d find all the dogs waiting in kennels their forever homes. Yep, I’d do that for reals. Only after that would I use any leftover magic to convince my mom to give me more of the chew disk things that I love but she worries aren’t very good for me.
What would you do if you were an Elf? You have to name one thing for others you care about, and one thing for yourself too, okay? Because you guys are super duper important too. Mom says it all the time!
Wednesday, November 20th, 2019
Hi guys, it’s me, Maggie. But don’t tell, okay? I’m hiding from my mom and Wizard dad. I’ll show you how good I am at hiding:
Pretty amazing, am I right?
So yesterday, mom decided to clean the carpets upstairs, and while she was doing that, the big monster machine was spitting out wet clumps of black hair.
Guess who they blamed? Can you even believe they blamed me, Maggie?
So then I got my feelings a little bit of mad-hurt, and I hid from them. I bet they’re gonna feel real bad when they can’t find me, and then won’t care so much about my hair.
Later On That Same Day: Guys, you know what? My hiding must have worked, because Wizard-dad gave me an extra treat-bone for no reason! He never does that!
Happy Wednesday everyone and I hope you get an extra treat today!