We decompressed a lot this weekend, which is good. I’ll talk a bit more about that in a second. First let’s get in those weekend highlights.
For Maggie, it was Youngest coming over! I happened to be outside talking to Wizard when he pulled up. I waited while he backed his trailer in, and we loaded some stuff we were taking to a city drop off (where you can dispose of unwanted stuff). Once it was safe, I let Maggie out. She squealed in happiness and ran to youngest. Then a car was coming, so she had to come sit by me. She did as she was told, but added a helicopter tail of joy and lots of vocalization. Once she was released, Youngest pet her properly. It cracks me up because she was terrified of him when we first got her. Then youngest and Wizard drove off and Maggie waited by the window until they came home and we went through the entire joyful greetings again.
Wizard had a good weekend too. He did a lot of things around the house, but he’s doing fine.
My highlight was going to see Turbo! It’s been weeks and that was fine, everyone understood. Yesterday, Wizard went with another brother-in-law to handle some things, and I drove out to oldest. Daughter in law had printed some pictures for me and I got to chat with her for a moment. She was going to brunch with some friends. Oldest and I went to breakfast with Turbo, then when Oldest was distracted, Turbo and I plotted a trip to Target to buy toys and then we “made” Oldest take us (Oldest was more than willing, LOL). It was simple and fun, and Turbo talked my ear off, catching me up on his life. I loved it. After that, they went to baseball and I came home because I wanted to check on Wizard, who was fine, but I’m in protective mode and he’s very indulgent about it
Now back to why we were decompressing a bit this weekend. I can talk about they why of this now — Wizard’s younger brother had had cancer for well over six years, outliving all expectations. But he kept his diagnoses pretty private and we did all we could to respect that choice. Wizard’s brother was an amazing man who loved his family above all else. He also passionately loved sports, cars (his Shelby Mustang), music and so much more. He also suffered many injuries over his lifetime including a broken neck. The man was damn near indestructible.
But we all know cancer doesn’t care who you are, how strong you are, or what you’ve survived. It doesn’t care how many people love you. Cancer doesn’t care. But my brother-in-law fought hard, and he cherished all his good days. He has left us all the lesson to not take our days for granted.
I do want to say this as Wizard’s wife who is clearly biased Wizard was retired already when his brother got sick, and he spent every moment he could with his brother. Either taking him to doctors, treatments, visiting, running him places — it didn’t matter. They became not only brothers but best friends. There are so many other people who deserve all the credit for loving and taking care of him — his wife, his daughter, his step daughters and a son-in-law — they were all there with him every step of the way. But what I saw on my end was Wizard’s love and determination that no matter how much it hurt later, he’d savor each moment they had at the time. I am so proud of him. So. Very. Proud.
I won’t go on and on about this. It was just weird to have something so big and important in our lives and not be able to share it. It likely sounded like I did nothing all day when I was often with him (it was 100 miles round trip to see him), or doing research (usually to enhance our understanding of things, but never to tell my brother-in-law or his wife what to do — they were in charge and we were their supporters) or trying to handle things so Wizard could be available.
So that’s our weekend, it was both sad and good, probably as it should be. We are turning our attention to being there for his wife and daughter, and also, resuming our lives as we feel ready.
How was your weekend? I really do want to know!